CLICK BELOW FOR THE VIDEO:
MAKING IT STICK: understanding how to set goals & not backslide
The workshop was conducted together with Adam Strong of www.xclusivecorporatefitness.com. In these excerpts, I concentrate on speaking about the ‘head game’ – not just the preserve of elite sport, but also vital in business and managing and sealing goals.
Offering patience as a possible option in fashioning new life strategies can meet with short shrift – and that’s putting it mildly. Patience is often regarded as ‘off the pace’: a waste of time when we should be out there ‘making things happen’. Patience is seen by many as too ‘wait and see’, or being passive, docile and even weak.
REVOLUTION OR EVOLUTION?
Most of us know of individuals who on deciding to make a new life change just do so: quitting smoking, training for their first marathon, losing 40lbs… they seem capable of a 180 degree with unshakable determination. We can respect and applaud such discipline & force of will but revolution is not for everyone. AND we certainly must not make comparisons and use those as a stick with which to beat ourselves. For many people evolution is a better fit: a more measured planned approach can get us to where we want to be.
BABY STEPS
It’s all bout forward momentum. Have you ever put a toddler down and turned away, only for a matter of seconds, and then turned back only to have to begin trying to track them down? Well, there’s nothing wrong with baby steps! So the sort of patience I refer to has nothing to do with ‘wait and see’ but is all about planned persistence at your pace. It does not signify lack of proactivity – quite the contrary, it’s all about devising an action plan combined with perpetual and most important of all – relentless forward momentum:
MEETING THE CHALLENGE ON YOUR TERMS
By setting your own pace, you can manage your own evolution by taking measured and positive steps every single day, for example:
To achieve goals it’s not a prerequisite to take giant leaps, or to turn lives upside down (however, if that’s the pace you want to set that’s fine). Change can be gradual: it evolves, and as such is grows into a natural fit and this time it will take!
The practice of thinking in new ways and doing new things often enough can alter lives a piece at a time. Quick fixes and short term enthusiasm so often leads to short lived benefits, disappointment & regression. Evolution can be the key to real change in thinking and in behaviour and replicates how we took on bad habits – we’ve just reverse the flow. So positive changes can ‘take’ and become our new good habits. What took decades to condition our lives cannot necessarily be turned around in weeks, but real beginning can be made – in bite size pieces….buon appetito!
Alan Keyse is a fully qualified Business and Life Coach who now applies his 30 years of experience as a sales executive to coaching Emotional Intelligence to business leaders, executives, managers and their staff. Alan specialises in stress reduction; conflict avoidance; & employee engagement.
Our desire to be a different body shape to that we already possess is one of the obsessions of our age and so many of us are subject to this at some time or other.
THERE’S NO SECRET
We all know what it takes to be in better shape and unless we are impeded by a medical condition, we know that it could not be simpler: eat better and be more active. Anyone who has problems with yo-yo dieting and ‘workout phobia’, however, knows that it is clearly not that simple. If it were we would all be doing it instead of complaining about it. We want to improve our fitness, we know how to go about it and yet so many of us struggle – clearly there must be another dynamic involved.
EXAMINING MOTIVATION
The first place to look if we are struggling is to examine our motivation for wanting to diet/workout. If we are having difficulty we are most likely not doing it for the right reasons – we are not doing it for our reasons. We may be pressured into trying to make change by, for example:
If we work at developing higher levels of personal awareness, we are able to bring into sharper focus our own emotions and motivations. This in turn will provide the lasting shift in thinking and therefore habits, that will make yoyo diets and wasted gym memberships a thing of the past. In short, a well thought through healthy lifestyle program will focus on:
1. Helping to establish realistic goals that reflect innermost desires.
2. A step-by-step plan to achieve those goals.
3. Clearing the mind through meditation so thoughts become less cluttered, allowing distractions to be observed, understood and more readily handled.
4. The removal of guilt, shame, and self-judgement for how we think we look at the moment – and the low self esteem issues that come with them.
5. A positive attitude to a change in lifestyle and the acceptance of setbacks as a basis for continued forward momentum and not a reason for backsliding.
6. Accepting full ownership of the journey and ultimately of the success it will bring.
The success, or not, of a health & wellness programme has a great deal to do with our social conditioning and mental attitudes. If we are carrying burdens of, for example, unrealistic expectations, guilt, and shame – that is the weight loss we need to tackle just as much as unwanted waistlines. By focusing on the inner challenges we face, as an integral part of healthy lifestyle goals, we can achieve a real and lasting change – the way we want it!
Alan Keyse is a fully qualified Business and Life Coach who now applies his 30 years of experience as a sales executive to coaching Emotional Intelligence to business leaders, executives, managers and their staff. Alan specialises in stress reduction; conflict avoidance; & employee engagement.